A Leader’s Guide To Resolving Conflict

Have you ever found yourself caught in the middle of a heated disagreement or conflict?

Air thick with tension 🥺

Emotions running high 😠

Words bouncing around the room like firecrackers 🧨

As leaders, particularly in roles such as parents, teachers, team leaders, executives, or employers, we often find ourselves facing the challenge of mediating disputes among those under our leadership. In our handling of such disputes, it is important that we pay attention to how we handle the situation; in words and in approach.

It is our responsibility, to not just pinpoint the wrongs, but to foster growth and understanding.

Too often, phrases like “You shouldn’t have said that” or “You should have…” are wielded with good intentions but can inadvertently sow seeds of discord instead of foster resolution.

A Good Approach to Resolving Conflicts

Let me share an example that highlights the importance of handling conflicts with care and balance. Picture this: Sarah and Emma, two members of your team, have had a falling out. Hurtful words were exchanged by both of them and now Sarah is visibly shaken, on the verge of tears. As the leader, it’s your task to untangle the web of emotions and guide these individuals back to a place of understanding.

The first instinct might be to address the apparent perpetrator, in this case, Emma, with a stern “You shouldn’t have said that.” While it’s crucial to address inappropriate behaviour, stopping there could inadvertently reward bad conduct. The key thing is to delve deeper, to recognise that conflicts are seldom one-sided.

Sarah’s hurtful words may well have triggered Emma’s response, creating a cycle of negativity. As leaders, our role is to promote accountability and growth. Instead of reprimanding Emma alone, it is vital to consider the entire context. Both parties contributed to the conflict, and both should bear the consequences. Just because Sarah is visibly shaken and is on the verge of tears does not mean Emma is not hurt too.

Key Tools For Conflict Resolution

1. Active Listening: in resolving conflicts, active listening is your most powerful tool. Take the time to hear both sides of the story, allowing each person to express their feelings and concerns. By doing so, you not only gain a clearer understanding of the situation but also create an environment where individuals feel valued and heard.
2. Objective Action: Once you’ve grasped the nuances of the disagreement, it’s time to act. Rather than singling out one person for retribution (particularly in instances where both parties contributed to the conflict), consider a shared accountability approach. Make both parties aware of the consequences of their actions. Then encourage them to apologise to each other if need be. This fosters a sense of responsibility and helps build a culture of respect and empathy within the team.

As a leader, your duty extends beyond simply addressing conflicts; it’s also about cultivating a positive and inclusive environment. By recognising and addressing bad behaviour promptly, you can prevent it from festering and spreading. In doing so, you contribute to the resolution of the immediate conflict as well as the long-term well-being of the team.

In conclusion, keep this in mind; conflict resolution is an art, one that requires finesse, understanding, and a commitment to growth. As a leader, you have the power to transform conflicts into opportunities for learning and collaboration. When you actively listen–holding individuals accountable for their behaviour–and promote shared responsibility, you’ll pave the way for a harmonious, thriving team.

Lead Right and Live Light,

Belinda